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01 December 2005 @ 11:59 am
I'm starting to form a bad habit. Well...maybe it's not that bad. It's just that lately I've been going to Starbucks every morning to get coffee. The reason why it's bad? Becuase I'm spending $5.00 every morning for something that has just as much calories as a Big Mac! So I'm pretty much spending $25 a week as well....which can add up in the long run. Not good.

I'm at work...and it's Thursday....and it's the first of the month....meaning we're slow off our asses! Oh lord, everyone here is just dying!! We all are tired and we all want to go home plus it's snowing outside and I don't know about them but I have a very strong urge to go outside and enjoy it before going home and reading by the window with a cup of tea. Mmm...that sounds so nice! There's talk about us getting out early today and if that can't happen then I know my manager said that we can help her put up the Christmas tree in the lobby if there's nothing for us to do. I wouldn't mind doing that! This brings back memories of last year when I was at Countrywide and I had to decorate the section I was in and I had to literally climb up on the desk to get the garland up. It actually turned out pretty nice. I made a Christmas tree from the leftover garland and had it going from the ceiling to the desk. Oh goodness, Countrywide! I do not miss you! Haha! Anyway...

I gotta get going. My breaks almost over. I'll see if I can update later.


<3 Melissa

PS: It happened. He was arrested a week ago and the court dates start soon. Thought I should announce that. I would also advise that if you don't know, don't ask.
I saw RENT again last night for the second time. I saw it with Ryan and I have to say it was better the second time around rather than the first. I don't know if it was becuase I had better company or if I knew what I was expecting. Either way, it was all in all a rather enjoyable experience. After the movie, Ryan and I headed off to Applebees where we had buffalo wings, apple cheesecake chimichunga, and a random meeting with Perry -- "I'm gonna go out and get a smoke" = This is awkward so I'm gonna disappear? Possibly. We had a good talk too. It's been decided that I'm going to change my hair drastically but I won't do it until New Years Eve so that I can surprise people and look good when I go out to party. Ack! It's going to be so cool but so weird! I hope I can handle it!

I'm not really telling a lot of people what's going to happen in the near future but I'm excited because it may possibly involve Chicago. I've been looking into it over the last few days and everything looks good but if I wanna do it, I'd have to do it now seeing as how I don't have a lot of time to get ready for it! If it does happen, it'll change me for the better. Just get me out of that slump i've been in the last year and a half. It needs to happen. That's all that I have to say!

Right now I'm on my 15 minute break from work. The starbucks I had for breakfast is upsetting my stomach though I'm not surprised seeing as how that was the only thing I had this morning alongside a little cream cheese brownie that someone brought in for us to munch on. I haven't been eating as healthy as I should but then agian, I noticed that I hardly eat at all. There are many a time when coffee replaces an actual meal. Melissa = a coffee addict. Yes indeed! It helps me stay awake throughout the long workdays and I feel more productive that way. I'm glad I'm addicted to caffeine and not anything else. There are times when I"m really grateful that I don't have any serious serious problems. For what I've gone through the last year, I'm surprised I'm not smoking or having some sort of horrible eating disorder. Last weekend gave me a little self esteem boost. Just a little. Then talking with Ryan last night about why we both aren't like everyone else boosed it just a little more. Makes me glad that I have some friends who can agree with me and my beliefs.

SO my breaks almost up.'s been up for the last five minutes but my supervisor is so busy that I don't think she's going to notice. I have a really strong urge to see RENT again tonight but I have to close at Liz Claiborne. Oh how fun that will be! Haha! Goodness...but I have to do it. I'm starting to slack off when it comes to working. I think it might be the fact that people are coming home. I always tend to get lazy around this time of year. Plus I'm on this big RENT kick because I'm just so excited the movies out. I may get the movie soundtrack on my break because I LOVE Mimi's (Rosario Dawsons) voice! Plus my RENT cd's at home and I wanna listen to it when I go on lunch today!

So yes...anyways...

I'm gonna get going. Back to working on files! I will try my best to write later or something.

Chow darlings!

<3 Melisas
Current Music: RENT
28 November 2005 @ 08:11 pm
I really want to do something utterly drastic. I'm dead serious. I want to do something that isn't me like maybe going goth or something like that. I have no idea. My first thoughts went to my hair. Wouldn't it be amazing if I put a little color in it? And I'm not talking about the typical blonde, brunette, red crap....maybe have a little red streaks or something? I don't know. I just need to feel original. Even if it's just for a moment.

Any ideas?
Current Mood: creativecreative
09 November 2005 @ 08:51 am
I have this sudden urge to play piano. Nothing like my old keyboard I keep in my room. No. I would like to be in a church or a large room with lots of resonance playing and letting myself being enveloped by the beauty of the music. The only problem? I don't play piano. Though I do miss being in a large room listening to someone playing piano.

I miss A.J. Penny

"Sing us a song, you’re the piano man
Sing us a song tonight
Well, we’re all in the mood for a melody
And you’ve got us feelin’ alright"
04 November 2005 @ 10:18 am
So I guess I'm just prone to gossip. At work today I found a sticky note on the back of my work binder that said, "Extra Binder. Doesn't seem like Melissa's gonna be here anymore. Shh..." What!?!?

The only thing that would make them think that I would be quitting is that someone from Office Team (my temp agency) told them that I was but when I talked to them regarding an update, I told them that I was unsure but that I'd finish the week out. Why does that give people the reason to post sticky notes on my things saying that someone else can have them?? I'm so livid right now. I did talk to my manager about it and she kept apologizing to me and saying that they assumed I was quitting becuase they didn't know what my decision would be by week end. Still, I would tell someone today if there was any doubt but I need this job right now. As much as I hate it, I can't give it up.

Oh god, I need to go home and destress
03 November 2005 @ 08:37 am
I'm so burnt out right now. I got 7 hours of sleep last night and yet I still feel like it's not enough. I really gotta stop doing this whole 14 hour work day thing becuase it's killing me. Have you ever been so tired that you're eyelids burn and they're overly heavy and all you want to do is close them? Yes, that's what's going on with me right now. I can't wait for the weekend. I really want to stop by the forest preserve and just chill out. I love having time to myself to just sit and think but with the way things have been going this week, I haven't had the time to go. I miss just feeling relaxed and content. I also miss having the time and energy to not only work a full day but do something fun afterwards. Like theatre and dance. It's been a long time but I think doing it will be good for me. I've lost a lot of my passion over the past year. Lost? No, maybe misplaced would be a better word. I need to get it back.

Breaks over. I'll write later.

<3 M.
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Damien Rice! I have found thee after 3 long months of searching! *Runs off and puts Amie and Volcano on repeat for the next four hours*

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Sorry James Blunt...I gotta go back to my first love...

Speaking of which, has anyone noticed the eery resemblance Damien has with A.J. Penny? Weird..... Hot! But weird.....

Oh lord do I need sleep!

But first, the day!

Didn't think I'd skip out on a journal entry, did you? Of course not! Today was the biggest blow off day ever! I left work "sick" because I just could NOT stand being there. I have never hated a job so much....and you would think that I've hated every job but no. I really haven't. There was Annabella's (psycho gossip job with an owner who didn't know my name after I worked there 6 months), Countrywide (with the psycho bitch Jackie who called me stupid every day I worked there PLUS never getting my paycheck on time because their payroll SUCKS! Don't work there!), and then there was Benetton (where every girl there did their best to get me fired on a daily basis). Yeah, not fun. But this job?'s just plain fucking boring! I've hated it since the first day. It's everything about a job that I despise. It makes me want to do something crazy...something drastic....

*smirks* But I won't say what that something is....

Anyway! After going home and sleeping a few hours, I called a few people and then headed out to my old stomping grounds. Got a few things that I needed, reminisced, and left to go to my chiropractor appointment. I ended up getting there late but was still able to get in. While I was getting my back adjusted my chiropractor just randomly says, "Oh by the way, Marks here. Is that ok? You can leave out the side door if you want to. I forgot you guys were scheduled back to back." Of course she knows I dislike him but I was not going to sneak out the back door to avoid confrontation. I don't hate him that much. So I leave and Marks reading a Rolling Stones magazine trying to pretend that he doesn't see me coming and I do my goddamn best to smile my widest all the while pretending that I didn't know he was here. First of all, Marks a stick. Someone needs to feed that boy a cheeseburger or something because he looks like he hasn't been all....but he still has that cocky "I'm better than you" attitude. So when I said "Hello" to him he put on his best "I hate you but I'm too good to let you know it so I'm gonna do my best to kill you with kindness" face. Marks a good actor but not that good. I swear, that kid needs to remember his roots and realize that he sucked way back when and how much he learned from the people around him (i.e.: the TMC cast) and he probably wouldn't be where he is now without us all. I hate people like that.

So yes, after I left I stopped at the bank, went home for a bit, and then headed off to work. Unfortunatley work sucked but it went by fast so I didn't really care. Our DM was there (of course!) and decided that he wanted to make the store as perfect as possible and be a little bitch to everyone around him. Of course that included me. He made my store manager take me over and give me some "tips" on customer service and that I need to approach more customers. Ummm....hello! Normally I work a fucking 9 hour shift before this! All I wanna do is spend my four hours here in peace and just work silently. I don't want to go out of my way to help stuck up old women dig through sales racks only to have them buy one thing. Nuh-uh! I was pissed....but I put on a smile anyways.

Thanks to the efforts of a majorly pregnant and moody Judy, we ended up leaving at 9:15. Thank god...

So now I'm just chilling out for a bit until I get tired enough to go to bed. Tomorrow's gonna be a long long day. I have work, my counseling appointment (which I'm starting to dread again), and then working the second job. I'm debating whether or not I wanna spend money and take up a dance class once a week. I nixed the idea once I thought that Beth and I were gonna join Lifetime but that ideas out because we don't wanna spend $60 a month for something we're not gonna be using all the time. The thing is, if I did take a dance class...when would I do it??? With my first job, counseling, chiropractor appointments, my second job, and everything else in between I have very limited time to put to something else. I think it would be good for me though. I miss expressing myself with art. It's been a long time since I've done something with dance but as much as I wanna do it, I don't wanna burn myself out. *sighs* I don't know. I'll think about it tomorrow. Maybe I'll do something easy like Theatre Dance. Who knows...

But I'm gonna head out. Time for this girly to go to sleep. Take care everyone!

<3 Melissa

PS: Last weekend was the Chicago trip. I'll to my best to write about that when I get more time. Chow darlings!

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31 October 2005 @ 03:09 pm
starlet_19's Halloween party:

_hushed_art dressed as Manny Ramirez.
_ohtheglitz dressed as Michael Jackson.
calibabe0486 dressed as Ozzy Osbourne.
dcypher85 dressed as a HuardDot Com employee.
entrata dressed as something model, but what, specifically, you can't tell.
gypsy_icons dressed as a Level 7 bard.
hikarichan20 dressed as a bear.
lady0fshallot dressed as Alyssa Milano riding a turkey, and it suited them all too well.
lovelark dressed as the Governor of Michigan.
megizzle dressed as Shaquille O'Neal.
midnightsnack04 gets drunk, strips naked, and somehow emerges dressed as Chester A. Arthur.
mightymilktea dressed as Mr. Sulu from "Star Trek", and it suited them disturbingly well.
milliduckie22 dressed as George W. Bush.
musiklover04 dressed as a devil.
sirchristopher dressed as a catcher for the Rockies, though it looked more like a volume.
skaismycure dressed as a weak hawk.
theiconfairy dressed as a disturbing self-made character called "Fluffy Bubblechunks", and it suited them all too well.
varga39 dressed as someone who just had sex.
yumechandesu dressed as Jennifer Lopez.

Throw your own party at the Hallomeme!
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28 October 2005 @ 02:34 pm
It's almost the weekend!!! An hour and a half left to go!

I'm on my 15 minute break so I don't have that long to write.

Today was BEAUTIFUL!!! Wow! I really wanted to take pictures today but my camera was out of batteries. I was so upset. Especially since, while walking by the water at the Forest Preserve I go to, this cute little Mallard duck walked right up to me. I mean, literally walked right up to my shoes and looked up at me with these cute little "puppy dog" eyes thinking that I had food for him. I melted, it was so cute! I wanted to take a picture since I had never seen a duck so comfortable walking up to a person but when I turned my camera on, it died right away. I don't know why seeing as how I just put batteries in but I knew it wouldn't turn out as nice as I wanted to because my camera doesn't take outside shots really well. I really want to get a better camera. I posted a comment on my friend Lady0fShallot's journal becuase she posted these LOVELY pictures. I was really jealous.

Oh! Gotta go! Breaks over! I'll add on more later!